Embracing the Challenges

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.
- Aristotle

It may sound a lot like the cliché, “Practice makes perfect,” but Aristotle is correct that being who we are comes from repetition of behavior to form behavior patterns. We use words like skills, habits and personal strengths to describe these behavior patterns. We can learn bad habits as well as good habits - any kind of behavior pattern at all. All it takes is repetition over time. We can develop addictions as well as character strengths. As Aristotle said it so well so long ago, "We are what we repeatedly do."

Why?....... because our brain cells are physically connected, the patterns they enable are hard-wired...and permanent. So if you want to break a bad habit, your challenge is to grow a new alternative neural pathway. You don't actually get rid of old, unwanted behavior patterns. You learn new ones that give you more satisfaction, which means you'll use them more and the old ones less. Meaning you can grow stronger by simply doing the right things consistently over time. The behavior may seem uncomfortable and awkward at first, but it becomes easier the more you do it.

You’ve heard the statistics – some scientists have suggested that, with a little willpower, it takes 21 days to break or form a habit, while others show it takes 30 days implementing each one. As with mastering anything new, the act of starting and getting beyond the preliminary stage where everything feels awkward- is battle. This is precisely why it is important to make small, positive changes every day. And when you start small like this, you won’t need a lot of motivation either. The simple act of getting started and doing something will give you the momentum you need, and soon you’ll find yourself in a positive spiral of changes – one building on the other. When I started doing this in my life, I was so excited about it that I started this blog to share it with you.

Use words that encourage happiness. - Normally, when I ask someone “How are you?” they reply, “I’m fine” or “I’m good.” It felt like I was talking to an automated machine. really! But one lazy and gloomy Monday afternoon last month a stranger replied, “Oh, I am fabulous!” It made me smile, so I asked him what was making him feel so fabulous and he said, “I’m healthy, my family is healthy, and we live in a free country. So I don’t have any reason not to be happy.” The difference was simply his attitude and his choice of words. He wasn’t necessarily any better off than anyone else, but he seemed twenty times happier.

Attracting the light - God's gifts are constantly showered upon us, everyday, but we choose not or even refuse to see them. No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

Blessing from a rude encounter - Yes, I had an encounter with a rude person. I find it rude because he cuts me off in traffic the other day. Then we ended up side by side at a stop light immediately after. I started to look over intending to flip the person the “bird” when I just decided to smile and change it to two fingers making the Peace sign. He smiled back and we both started to laugh. I’ve done it! several times since. I don’t think it benefits anyone to get all mad about a mistake. We all make them.

When another person is rude to us, perhaps the best lesson we can learn is how it feels on the receiving end when we are rude to others in moments of unconscious behavior. It’s a blessing. Secretly thank that person and whisper a silent prayer for them. It’s not worth getting all worked up and defensive. Find the lesson and move on.

The Running Mind - Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?” If not, then it’s not worth worrying about. On any given day, there is always something that presents itself as a problem that will bother us. When thinking about it, it seems like the most urgent and important thing, and indeed, it boggles our mind throughout the day. But the moment we replace that thought with another, the problem no longer seems so real. And when you overcome it, or stop seeing it as a problem, another problem will sure surface. That is the workings of our mind. It’s not real. Be aware of it.

Nature of Discontentment and Complaints - Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason. The moment we complain, we are taking this moment for granted and we are missing out on life. Shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.

As you progress through these challenges remember, personal growth is a slow, steady process. It can’t be rushed. You need to work on it gradually every day. The challenges doesn’t end with the conclusion of the program, but merely just began as I stepped into the outside world. As I continue to work on myself, new and unexpected challenges are already being formed in front of me, once again my mental and emotional limits are being tested by the turbulence of life. But this time, I am no longer afraid. I surrender to life with open arms and an open heart.